Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Self Discovery

At the workshop one of the first things I was asked to do was:
1. Take out a photo of myself when I was little.
(we had been told to bring one ahead of time)
2. Look at it.
3. Close my eyes and picture it in my mind.
4. Then I was guided on a meditation exercise to recall what I really wanted when I was that age. A time before I was influenced to think differently by my parents, teachers, religion and society. Before my parents told me that having a horse was too much work and too expensive. Before my teachers taught me that artists don't make money. Before my religion taught me that rich people are greedy and that the best way to help the world is to give up your career and become a full time missionary. Before society taught me that playing with dollhouses was for little girls not adults and that if I'm not going to dance as a career then there is no need to continue taking dance lessons. I "should" focus on something that I'm good at. I "should" not be rich but still have plenty money to tithe to the churc. I "should" become a missionary. I "can't" make money if I want to pursue fine art. I "shouldn't" get a horse because it's not practical.
Kieren says "Stop should-ing on yourself!"
5. Later I was asked to take out a more recent photo and reflect on what my dreams are now and what of my childhood dreams have I accomplished since that time until now.

This exercise was the most exciting part of the workshop for me. I felt like there were so many things that I loved to do as a child and I still want to do them but somewhere along the way I came to believe that there weren't practical or they were too juvenile.


For example during the childhood reflections we were given time to create a list. The list was of things I wrote that I had always wanted to have my very own Arabian horse to go on adventures with in the country side. I loved rearranging my dollhouse furniture and thinking up my own designs for dollhouse accessories as well as trying to make my own out of clay and paper. I remember looking through the PlayMobil catalogue and wishing I could be the person who sets up the dolls and funiture in the doll houses to be photographed for the catalogue. I realized that in the moment of remembering these dreams I felt so excited aboutk my life ahead of me and inspired to make something artistic.
Like this fairy cottage below that I found on google. To whoever made this....you're awesome!

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